Her Name Was Jyoti Singh Pandey. And #WeWillNotForget #RIPJyoti

The father of the victim of the Dehli Gang Rape has spoken out, naming his daughter as Jyoti Singh Pandey.

Jyoti Singh Pandey. Remember that name. Because it will be on my lips, and at my fingertips, for the rest of my life.

We cannot forget the horrific assault that was carried out on Jyoti. Because when we do, we forget the harsh reality that faces so many women. But worse still, we forget Jyoti. We forget how she fought up until her dying days, and how she united so many women in her suffering.

If we forget her name, we forget that India saw 572 rapes reported in 2011, and 635 reported by the time Jyoti was raped. If we forget her name, we forget that she was not the first woman to be raped. Nor, despite all our fighting against male violence, will she be the last.

I do not have Jyoti’s words. Male violence killed her. Jyoti’s mother is unable to speak through grief. I am left solely with her father’s noble words.

Doctors did their best to save her. She spoke a few times but mostly through gestures. She had a feeding pipe in her mouth making it difficult for her to speak. But she did write on some paper that she wanted to live, she wanted to survive and stay with us. But it was fate that had the last say in the end.

We want the world to know her real name. My daughter didn’t do anything wrong, she died while protecting herself. I am proud of her. Revealing her name will give courage to other women who have survived these attacks. They will find strength from my daughter.

Jyoti’s family have asked that her image is not released. But we know of Jyoti’s hopes, and aspirations. She had just completed a course in physiotherapy, and had undertaken an internship, hoping to become a doctor.

A petition has sprung up, asking the President of India to address the rape issue in the country. You can sign the petition here.

Her name was Jyoti Singh Pandey. And we will not forget her. We cannot afford to.

(Video: Jimmy Eat World – Hear You Me. Dedicated to Jyoti Singh Pandey. May angels lead you in)


The Crunk Feminist Collective

**trigger warning**

A few weeks ago, a young Indian woman went to the movies. On her way home she took a bus on which she was raped and brutally assaulted by six men. We don’t know the name of this 23-year-old student.  We do know that  she was tortured so badly that she lost her intestines and needed numerous operations. Six people – including the bus driver – have been arrested. On Friday, December 28 she died.

I don’t know her name. I don’t have an adequate response, but I feel I should say something. Because I was born in the city where she were assaulted. Because so many, too many, experience such violence. Because I spend most of my waking hours thinking about how we can create a world where women are safe. Because she wanted to live.


This is both about and not about men. Here…

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New Year’s Resolution: Frothy Style…

So, I had vowed I wouldn’t be making New Year’s Resolution’s this year. For the past few years, my resolutions had been steeped in misogyny and self-hatred, masked as self improvement. I mean, losing that two stone it’d take to get back into my favourite dress wouldn’t make me happier, nor would it make me a better person. But Christmas this year has been, to say the least, stressful. And to my twitter followers, I’d like to say a quick “sorry” for all the rants, and “thanks” for all the support that came as a result. But amongst the stress, and the misogynistic/homophobic/other slurs from my family, and mainly my parents, I found myself thinking. I do have resolutions. I’d just chose to say that there were none when asked, purely to retain the peace for a little longer.

So here goes.

  1. I will be more active in my feminism. As of yet, I’ve struggled with being too active in my feminism. I’m stuck in a small town, and grow increasingly concerned on a regular basis that I’m the only feminist in the area. In order to deal with this, I’ll be doing what I can to make it to marches, conferences and what not… I will be seen somewhere outside of my postcode, at some point before Reclaim The Night.
  2. I will continue working on my novel. And I will get it bloody published. Honest. This is the year I attempt to make it as a writer to some degree.
  3. I will strive towards my goal of working in a position where I can support women. I’ll be starting my counselling course in February, and from there,alongside a voluntary position, I plan to aim for a career in which I’ll be able to support women in one way or another.
  4. I will write more frequently. I’ve finally got certain things under control, and have  no excuse not to write more often. At the very least, I strive to blog at least once a week.

So there you have it. Four New Year’s Resolutions that I can keep, that don’t involve compromising who I am. And they’re a damn sight easier to stick to than the plans to squeeze into THAT dress…