“Always: Have A Happy Period”… Or How To Really Advertise Sanitary Products.

This was slightly inspired by a friend’s rants about period pains. By period pains, I don’t mean the cramping you get once a month (or thereabouts, depending on your cycle). I mean those stupid fucking adverts that demand you have a happy period whilst the “devil’s treacle oozes down your legs” (Of COURSE, periods… work of the devil, right? Cheers for the woman hating, Tampax…) Or, y’know… Tampax’s assertion that a short skirt = high confidence.

See, all these women in tampon and sanitary adverts are happy, smiley women… Because, y’know… SAPPHOS FORBID a woman should absolutely hate being on her period?

When I fist started my periods in 1999/2000, my sanitary towels came wrapped in green wrappers with quotes on… Usually little snippets of info about your menstrual cycle.  I propose we go back to this. However, I’ve also considered some new adverts for Always and Tampax.

I want to know I’m not the only woman that puts on 58lbs the week before my period. I want adverts that tell me it’s reasonable to take a chainsaw to next door’s speakers. I want to know that it is reasonable to want to yell at the person sat next to you on the bus for daring to breathe, and I want to know that shouting at the TV for being full of sexist shit… Oh wait… That’s not restricted to “That time of the month”. But you get the point.

And while we’re at it, can we stop telling people that short skirts are the epitome of confidence? They’re not. They’re a clothing choice.

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4 thoughts on ““Always: Have A Happy Period”… Or How To Really Advertise Sanitary Products.

  1. I have to agree with you that feminine hygiene products tend to miss the mark 10 times out of 10. I’d love to know why! Here’s a link to a Kotex ad I’m not sure if you’ve seen before, it’s a fresh humorous take on tampon ads.

    Ex: “The ads on TV are really helpful because they use that blue liquid and I’m like, oh, that’s what that’s supposed to look like!”
    Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRf35wCmzWw

  2. The advert that’s currently grinding my gears is one for knicker-liners, in which a group of women have a “party” in a phone booth.
    Short skirts? Check. Close-ups of suggestive pretendy lesbian grinding? Check. Inviting a leering man to join in? Check.
    The product isn’t even for period pads. It’s for the “everyday” kind that we should all apparently use if we want another woman to dry-hump us in a confined space. Or persuade a man to get within ten feet of us without a nose clip.
    Because women’s bits – even when we’re not riding the crimson wave – STINK!
    I despair, I really do.

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