There’s a problem with being a feminist. Every now and then, you find those who believe men should have the right to abuse, rape and kill women will hit back, in what they think is the worst way. And when you’re a radical feminist, with a male child, they believe they have an extra line of attack. Or they can attack your experience of rape. Or they can send you thinly veiled threats, in the style of an illiterate Blondie/One Direction fan. They think they can scare you into silence. Instead, they forget they’re sending these threats to someone who borrows insults to add to her profile, and, even at the worst points in their life, takes solace in writing. So, to my darling little trolls, thank you for the writing prompts. If you have any more, you know where to submit them.
Now, firstly, if you have shit with me, then fair enough. But the fact you’ve chosen to attack my son by proxy says a lot about you. The fact I can love and care for a young boy, whilst challenging men’s violence against women terrifies some people. It doesn’t add up. According to them, I’m some frothing man hater, who must be channelling my hatred of men onto my son. I confuse you all, don’t I? In the MRAs mind, I’m supposed to hate men. Seriously. If you think I hate all men, you’re not paying enough attention. Seriously, your stalking skills are somewhat lacking. But the fact you’d drag a child into your attacks concerns me. Do you do the same with children in your own life? I suspect so. Which, you know, saddens me a lot.
As for attacking my experience of rape, telling me that I deserved it… I know this didn’t come from the same troll. I’m feeling slightly honoured that I have more than one. But seriously. Telling someone they deserved to be raped? I’m assuming you’re from “Justice For Ched”. You’re not helping your cause. At all. I’m open about my experience for a reason. I know I didn’t deserve to be raped. No one does. It doesn’t matter if they’ve drunk the bar dry, taken every drug available to man, whether they’re prostitutes, or even the person who sent me that “question”. Seriously. None of your victim blaming bullshit is going to make me believe anyone deserves to be raped. If men could refrain from raping, that would be lovely, thanks. And if people could stop applauding men for raping, that would be even better.
But, a quick note to the MRAs, the Justice For Ched brigade… Those who hate women THAT much… Other people may shut up because of you. But surely you all know by now that any silence from me is temporary, and most likely coincidental. Seriously. I have a life outside Twitter, Facebook, WordPress. You know what I feel is relevant. And, to Kathryn Rice, yes, that does included that detail about my nephew. I’ve never claimed to be perfect. Nor have I claimed that my family are. But my feminism includes being honest. Sometimes brutally. And not standing for bullshit, either. I can promise you. My family’s actions don’t define me as a feminist, but they sure as hell encourage my feminism. And no, that doesn’t mean I’ll step down from challenging your bullshit.